Love is a prerequisite for a peaceful human existence; it guarantees the survival of the human race. The Lord Jesus summarized the guiding rules (10 commandments) that govern human survival on earth into Love: love for God and love for man (Mark 12:29-31).
However, because we live in a fallen world where the author of evil, the devil is equally present, love is threatened. Therefore for love to prevail as was intended by God from creation, it must be intentional.
Intentional love paints a picture of a determined love, love that does not turn to evil despite every odd. This type of love is patient, it’s kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs, it does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth, it always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres, and it never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a).
The Honest truth is, it isn’t very easy to practice this kind of love, but it is very possible. The story below illustrates how intentional love is put to action.
Angelina
Angelina was raised by a single mother who did her best to cater for her needs, loved, and protected her. The love of her mother made up for the absence of her father, a man she had never known because her mother will not talk about him, she called him a painful mistake and promised Angelina she will love her as a father and a mother. However, at the age of 11, Angelina’s mother fell in love again and got married. Her step father, because of the love he had for Angelina’s mother, accepted to raise and love Angelina as his own. But at age 12, Angelina’s parents were blessed with twins (a boy and girl) and their attention completely turned from Angelina to her new siblings. She understood that it was natural for her parents to sway their attention from her because of the excitement of having her siblings. She was later on sent to a boarding school where she felt the gravity of the negligence of her parents especially from her mother who had loved her like her own heartbeat. Their attention had completely drifted away from her. Her step dad who had gotten a promotion in his job was always travelling and very busy, when he had a free time he focused all his energy on his kids. He did not create time to pay Angelina a visit in school. Her mother too was now so very focused on pleasing her husband and taking care of the twins that she neglected her Angelina and rarely visited her too. Though Angelina had a considerable pocket allowance to sustain her throughout each school term, she was lacking the love of her parents; what she needed most. The negligence continued even during the holidays, when she tried complaining her parents would ask her what else she wanted when all her needs were catered for, and her mother would warn her to show appreciation to her husband who has accepted her as his daughter.
In the midst of all these, Angelina determined to love her parents; she refused to harbor any feeling of bitterness against her step dad or against her mother. She would remind herself of how privileged she was to have her step dad as her father, who accepted whereas her biological father had abandoned her even before she was born. She would cling to the memories of when it was just her and her mother, how her mom loved her and the many constructive advices she gave to her, and took her to church every Sunday where she heard some of the amazing stories she had heard in her life.
With this resolve, Angelina remained positive, hardworking and very appreciative of her parents. She became friends with Martha, her classmate at the age of 14, they both made the top 3 in every exam but Martha was always first. Martha was an orphan but was always very happy. As she grew close to Martha she discovered that Martha’s joy was beyond the love she received from her foster parents, Martha had surrendered her life to Jesus Christ and because of Jesus; Martha could love and forgive everyone continually even when she was mocked for being poor and an orphan. With the help of Martha, Angelina surrendered her life to Jesus and she testified that she had never felt the kind of peace she was currently feeling after surrendering her life to Jesus.
There was a massive change in Angelina’s life after this. She realized that she no longer struggled to love her parents; she was more patient, kind and enduring with them. She was more gentle, respectful and did not complain as she had done during previous holidays. She was very prayerful, would wake up every day at 4am to study the Bible and worship God. She was equally very active in church programs within the week. Her parents gradually noticed her new behavior which challenged them to surrender their lives to Jesus. The also realized their failures towards Angelina, sought her forgiveness and endeavored to be present for all her school visitations.
The above story offers a great lesson of intentional love. Intentional love chooses to see the positive side in every situation regardless of how negative the situation may seem. Also, when we choose to love people even when they do not show us enough love, or when they hate us, we produce a positive effect that will one day affect their lives and cause them to change. Plus, love depicts Jesus Christ who is love, therefore when we love even those who hate us, we preach Jesus Christ to them.